Why is everyone talking about a "male loneliness epidemic?"


A brilliant friend and colleague of mine, Dr. Jennifer Pollitt, reminded me recently that when people ask us questions about sex, what they're actually asking underneath is am I normal? Am I worthy? Am I lovable? Am I safe? Am I enough?

These are the questions at the core of so many issues we struggle through.

Relatedly, I see the phrase "male loneliness epidemic" being used all the time on social media: I also see this retort from women when an individual man has done a particularly heinous thing: "men aren't nearly lonely enough."

So what does this mean, exactly? I think the phrase "male loneliness epidemic" means that men aren't encouraged to share feelings and build friendships/support networks like women are, and they certainly aren't encouraged to reach out to each other when they need help. We live in a hyper individualistic society, capitalism has driven us even farther from community, and the messages that men are receiving about how to treat women are rooted in misogyny, making them even lonelier. Hence many women being pissed, and men being more lonely!

I’m trying to make a dent in this loneliness epidemic with the creation of Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men. ​

Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men is an 8 week support, discussion, and education group for men who want to examine masculinity and patriarchy, especially in light of the rise of Christian Nationalism.

Men are wondering am I normal? Am I lovable? Am I worthy? Am I safe? Am I enough? with no one to talk to about it.

Here's your chance to talk.

Guys (or anyone who knows a guy)- if you were raised in a patriarchal, high control religion with very rigid expectations of your gender, and you want answers to some of those questions, this group is for you.

Here are the issues we’ll be exploring together:

  • Masculinity and what being a man means to you
  • Patriarchy
  • Gender roles and expectations
  • Intimate relationships
  • Fatherhood and family styles
  • Bodies and body image
  • Sex, porn, and masturbation
  • Violence
  • Shame and guilt
  • Your personal experiences and stories as related to the above topics

You can choose between several dates and times, and there are payment plans available.

​Wednesday's group begins on 5/6.​

​Thursday's group begins on 5/7. ​

​Sunday's group begins on 5/10. ​

Let's make a dent in this loneliness epidemic together, in practical and tangible ways.

You can reply directly to this email if you have any questions about these groups.

xo,

E

ps: Social media suppresses my reach, as is common with sex education content. If this group sounds important to you, please share it with anyone who may be interested- especially therapists who may want to refer clients. Thank you!!!

🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺

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600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
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Erica Smith, Sexuality Education and Consulting

I developed the Purity Culture Dropout™️ Program to help people learn all of the sex education that they missed growing up in purity culture- sex ed that is accurate, queer inclusive, trauma informed, compassionate, and comprehensive. I have worked with hundreds of people to help them learn about healthy sexuality after high control religion. Subscribe if you're curious about / invested in shame free sexuality education that's specifically tailored to the needs of people coming out of high control religions and purity culture. Expect information not just about healthy sexuality and upcoming programming, but also cultural commentary on sexual politics in the US. I'm a sex educator with 25 years of experience and I'm excited to share that with you.

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