I just got back from a trip to Muskegon, MI. I put some little business cards promoting The Purity Culture Recovery Guide in a few different coffee shops there. If you happen to find one, take a pic and I'll send you a prize! :)

As a sex educator who works specifically with people who were harmed by purity culture, you might suspect that my clients are mostly women and nonbinary people. You would absolutely be correct!

I don’t remember when my first male client booked a session, but they began to trickle in eventually. Seven years into this work, I’ve had more and more male clients, with diversity in regards to race, ethnicity, sexual orientation, age, relationship experience, and details of their religious backgrounds. The youngest was 19 and a burgeoning gay man, the oldest in his seventies and trying to sort out feelings of sexual shame.

Most of the men who book with me are in their 30s and 40s, navigating issues of intimacy, family, fatherhood, divorce, dating, gender expectations, and, of course, sex.

Until now, I have never divided my support groups by gender categories. I work to create gender inclusive spaces instead precisely because purity culture sows division and mistrust between men and women (and refuses to acknowledge other gender possibilities). My educational support groups (one for queer people and another for people divorced after purity culture) have always been mixed gender.

I’m changing that now with the creation of Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men. ​

People leaving or questioning their faith communities typically lose friendships along the way (and sometimes, painfully, realize those relationships weren’t so genuine in the first place). Men aren’t often encouraged to connect with each other and share their feelings, especially if those feelings are related to questioning the patriarchal status quo.

So what if men who grew up in purity culture could talk to other guys, in an environment where they’re all working through similar things, with a compassionate and skilled facilitator to guide them? That’s where I come in!

Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men is an 8 week support, discussion, and education group for men who want to examine masculinity and patriarchy, especially in light of the rise of Christian Nationalism.

I’ve already prepared a curriculum. Here are the issues we’ll be exploring together:

• Masculinity and what being a man means to you
• Patriarchy
• Gender roles and expectations
• Intimate relationships
• Fatherhood and family styles
• Bodies and body image
• Sex, porn, and masturbation
• Violence
• Shame and guilt
• Your personal experiences and stories as related to the above topics

You can choose between several dates and times, and there are payment plans available. You have a few weeks before we begin!

My hope for men who join these groups is that you connect and befriend other men who get what you're going through, especially if you feel like the odd man out in your friend circle/ family/ community.

xo

E

ps: Social media suppresses my reach, as is common with sex education content. If this group sounds important to you, please share it with anyone who may be interested- especially therapists who may want to refer clients. Thank you!!!