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Erica Smith, Sexuality Education and Consulting

What makes a man a "porn addict?" (the answer might surprise you)

Published 30 days ago • 2 min read

A male client once told me that his wife and pastor insisted he go to a "rehab" program because of his addiction to viewing pornography.

How often did this man engage with pornographic material? It must have been a lot, right?

According to him, he looked at porn maybe 3 to 4 times per year. In his pastor's view, this was enough evidence to indicate that he had a problem.

Here's something I personally find super interesting: a meta-analysis of research on pornography concluded that porn use does not predict problems with porn, but that religiosity does.

Wait, what?

Yes, the largest predictor of a man believing he is a porn addict isn't related to how much porn he engages with. It's related to how religious he is.

The researchers lay out their argument and theory extremely thoroughly, suggesting that Pornography Problems due to Moral Incongruence (PPMI) appear to be the driving force in many of the people who report dysregulated, uncontrollable, or problematic pornography use. Even though many people who grew up in religious, sexually conservative households have strong negative feelings about pornography, many of those same people continue to use pornography. And then they feel guilty and ashamed of their behavior, and angry at themselves and their desire to watch more.
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[M]oral incongruence around pornography use is consistently the best predictor of the belief one is experiencing pornography-related problems or dysregulation...it is consistently a much better predictor than pornography use itself…”

I know that is A LOT to unpack.

The topic of pornography is just one of the topics I want to talk to men about in Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men. ​

Shame-free discussions, open hearts, space to process feelings of confusion, guilt, shame, anger, grief, all of it. Bring it to me, guys. We're gonna talk about it.

Purity Culture and Masculinity: A Group for Men is an 8 week support, discussion, and education group for men who want to examine masculinity and patriarchy, especially in light of the rise of Christian Nationalism.

​Wednesday's group begins on 5/6.​

​Thursday's group begins on 5/7. ​

​Sunday's group begins on 5/10. ​

You can reply directly to this email if you have any questions about these groups.

xo,

E

ps: Social media suppresses my reach, as is common with sex education content. If this group sounds important to you, please share it with anyone who may be interested- especially therapists who may want to refer clients. Thank you!!!

🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺🌺

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600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
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Erica Smith, Sexuality Education and Consulting

The Purity Culture Dropout™ Program

I developed the Purity Culture Dropout™️ Program to help people learn all of the sex education that they missed growing up in purity culture- sex ed that is accurate, queer inclusive, trauma informed, compassionate, and comprehensive. I have worked with hundreds of people to help them learn about healthy sexuality after high control religion. Subscribe if you're curious about / invested in shame free sexuality education that's specifically tailored to the needs of people coming out of high control religions and purity culture. Expect information not just about healthy sexuality and upcoming programming, but also cultural commentary on sexual politics in the US. I'm a sex educator with 25 years of experience and I'm excited to share that with you.

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